Tuesday, January 17, 2012

In Defense of Karen Santorum

Any good defense attorney has to decide whether to ignore the 7, 8, our even 900 pound gorillas resting on the prosecution table, or, confront them head-on at the opening of his argument, and then strategically ignore then while simultaneously redirecting the jury's attention to less damning information.

Okay, so...usually a good defense attorney doesn't advertise their approach to the art of persuasion. However, in this case...since I'm probably the least likely advocate to offer a defense of any kind on behalf of Mrs. Tricky Ricky Sanatarium...I choose to acknowledge certain flaws in both the character of my client, as well as in our ability to interpose anything resembling a blanket denial of the charges against her...and to close with an extraordinary presentation in not only suggestion, but establishment of the fact that this wonderful wife, mother and pillar of the community, is in fact, being totally and completely abused and made mock of by a media, and societal segment, for no more than mere sport.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Thank you for your time, as well as your service to this community, our Commonwealth, and to the United States of America.

You have heard hundreds of witnesses throughout the court of this trial. They've given statements accounts, opinions, perceptions...some from direct knowledge and observation...and others based upon no more than mere conjecture, innuendo, or circumstantial and immaterial ramblings of individuals whose only purpose was not to aid in your understanding of the events surrounding either the facts of this case, or your duty to arrive at a fair, impartial, informed and intelligent decision regarding my client, Karen Garver Santorum.

Throughout this trial, I've been completely candid with you at every turn. There have even been times when I've known full well that some of you would grab your note pads before I had completed a statement...while the rest of you wondered what I could possibly be thinking about, in giving you some particular piece of evidence.

I gave you that information because this isn't a game of three card monty. I'm not Penn...the Prosecutor isn't Teller...though, it might have been nice if Mr. Prosecutor "sounded" like Teller.

I gave you each and every piece of information because this isn't a game of any kind at all...this is a trial. And, in a trial under our system...the only thing that matters is the truth. Maybe the prosecutor would feel remarkable if he earned a conviction under circumstances where you never had an opportunity to know the truth.

I hope not...

...but I'm smart enough and savvy enough to know that we live in a world where winning isn't everything...it's the only thing.

But our Founding Fathers weren't of that mindset when they took out their fine quill pens and wrote the greatest Constitution the world has ever known. Those great men created the presumption of innocence and demanded that YOUR verdict, in THIS case, embody all that is truth and justice...because THIS IS..."THE AMERICAN WAY".

With these principles as our collective cornerstone, I'm comfortable acknowledging that my client's behavior over the last three decades has been somewhat inconsistent.

Yes, she did make herself available as a 22 year old nursing student, to a man who was not only old enough to be her grandfather...but whose first tender slap on her butt was to facilitate the breath of life into her newborn body.

Yes, for those from among you who haven't attended nursing school...it is just fine for you to be unaware of the fact that on Day 1 of a student's freshman year, each Dr. in every hospital within a ten mile radius of the institution is assigned at least one pretty young thing to take under his wing and of course...do with as he pleases.

We acknowledge the somewhat unusual willingness of a young woman to openly play for a man already eligible for early retirement under Social Security Administration Regulations existing at the time.

But, is this conclusive proof that my client was abused by her father, wacky uncle, grandfather, teacher or some old guy who was on disability from the steel mill and watched her one night at the age of six while Mr. & Mrs. Garver went to Pittsburgh to get a couple of really good Polish sausages?

Of course, it doesn't prove any of that...

...does it?

Yes...my client went from being kicked to the curb by a seventy year old man...immediately into the arms of a guy who acted like an eighty year old man...and wore the exact same sweaters as the former Apple of her Eye...and caretaker of her loins.

Yes, she later home-schooled all 49 of her children...no doubt in an effort to make sure none of them were ever co-opted by an older, or rather ANCIENT...DECREPIT...DINOSAUR of a predator of the type and kind who obviously framed her outlook on the universe.

Yes...she took on the persona of a crusading anti-abortion, clinic- bombing, flag-waving, cross-burning psychopath...when for the previous six years she waited each day with bated breath, at the door of her home, anxiously awaiting that moment when her common law husband would return...wash the unborn child off of his hands and face...and then bend her over the neatest stationary flat object.

We admit that my client spent six years living with an active abortionist, cooked for him, cleaned for him, was each and every bit the wife she has been to her current husband...and accepted the fruits of his labor and benefit of his treasure...without ever once shoving a photo of a mutilated fetus in anyone's face...or, making statements which could be deemed to have justified the killing of medical professionals, or the fire-bombing of occupied dwellings.

Does this make her current husband a fraud?

Of course it doesn't...

...does it?

After all...put yourself in HIS shoes for a moment.

Senator Santorum has had to live for almost TWENTY-TWO YEARS...knowing that only moments before he met my client...she was giving it up to a guy who was not, only OVER SEVENTY YEARS OLD...but who had been running his moldy little mitts ALL OVER HER BODY...SINCE THE DAYS SHE WAS BORN.

Can no one among us, not understand how that thought alone would drive a man out of his mind?

For God's sake we, as a nation of people who may yet have to endure a President Santorum...should be THANKFUL...that we now know at least some of the reasons "WHY"...the term "batshit crazy" ALWAYS either precedes or follows the man's name.

So WHAT...if the actions of my client between the ages of 22, and the day before she sidled up to a sitting US Congressman and told him she was STILL "afraid of the dark" appear a bit "off". As far as he knew...she had never done anything like that before...

...ever.

...honest, Ricky Baby.

Now...having said that, and hypocrisy being aside...THE TRUTH IS...that my client CANNOT be held responsible TODAY, for events which occurred THIRTY YEARS AGO...and for which IT IS CLEAR, that those actions were the result of:

1. Being very young,
2. Being very stupid,
3. Being in a setting where physicians treat the new crop of freshman nurses like new meat at the state penitentiary,
4. Being away from home for likely the very first time,
5. Being a person who was likely a prior victim of serious sexual abuse as a child, AND,
6. Being totally and completely unprepared to deal with any aspect of the real world...PROBABLY AS THE RESULT OF BEING HOME SCHOOLED.

I am sincerely sorry for what had happened to Mrs. Santorum. The part of her life which she had little control over...and I suggest that has been all of her life...she can't be held responsible for. She had obviously gone from being victimized by "someone," to being victimized by Dr. Tom Allen, Abortionist and pseudo-pedophile, to being totally co-opted by the former Senator from Pennsylvania.

They all USED HER...

...just for different purposes.

It doesn't change the truth. My client has said, done, and continues to do things, daily...which are thoroughly inconsistent with many, if not every other aspect of her prior existence.

No man, woman or even child is immune from thIs circumstance. People DO change, however. We grow. We adapt. We become smarter, better informed, more understanding...Our hearts and minds open to new thoughts and ideas. And yes...we come to know God.

He forgives us, and we learn to forgive ourselves, as well as those who aided in bringing about the destruction in the first place.

However...no redemption commences, absent an acknowledgment of the past. What is hidden, shall be made known. And, while for at least twenty-two years, one politician, claiming to be a Christian, has prayed fire the timely demise of the abortion doctor who owned and possessed the mind, body and soul of the mother of his childrdn FOR SIX YEARS...not once, during any of his, or her hate speeches...or those of their now teenage surrogates...did any of the people who THOUGHT they knew WHY...ever have any idea...

...ever...

...did they?

Does Rick Santorum despise abortion?

Or, the abortion doctor who at the age of NEARLY 100 now has news vans and satellite trucks  lined up in his driveway...and George Stephanopoulos wanting an answer to the burning question of whether or not he needed viagra to put wood to the Senator's wife?

My client's rage is REAL.

My client has every right and entitlement to be angry with whoever abused her earlier in her life, in order to prevent her from realizing how messed up it is to serve up the coochie TO THE DOCTOR WHO DELIVERED YOU...WHEN YOU ARE 22 AND HE IS PUSHING 70!

My client went from abuse, to abuse, to abuse...with limited aggregate knowledge and absent ANY understanding of how the world works.

In this respect, she was not only the perfect woman for a complete and total bag of shit, like Rick Santorum. More likely, she was the ONLY woman he could ever either find, or be interested in...

My client is guiltly of no more than being serially abused...and, of course...buying into the bullshit of her respective abusers.

DECADES AGO...I told Rick Santorum, to his face, that he was full if shit.

He still is...

...and now he's embarrassed his entire family, with a story HE KNEW WOULD COME OUT...

...and for what?

So a dying daughter will later know that he ran from her in her hour of greatest need to feed his own ego, while he gutted the family he's pretended to love.

No need to quit the race now, Rick. How many more lives could you crush? Enjoy your swan song, my Friend.

End times are upon you.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury...forgive my client, for she knew not what she was doing...

However...should you opt to fry her bastard husband...

...knock yourselves out.

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